Di Da

My 1st Day @ CITCO

2011-05-30T23:36:00.002+08:00

It has been long time since I came here to write something. To tell you the truth, I've got my job offer in April @ CITCO. Then I asked to start work in May. I have some personal reasons. 1. Someone hurt my heart and I decided to go back to China, and most importantly, I planned not to say goodbye to SG. (However, I met a guy who inspired me and reminded me quite a lot of happy times when I was doing my degree courses. It's him that makes me feel like being crazy about everything that I've done before. So I decided to come back for him.) 2.There are really good opportunities in China. They are more promising I think and I can live with my parents, taking care of them.

Well, now the case is like I'm back to Singapore and starting a new life. Since this is my final decision, I should take it serious about both of my work and life. It should be a nice start. Just to make me get some feeling about work.

The 1st day @ CITCO was a little bit different what I expected before cuz 90%of my teamates were on leave today since they followed the western holiday calendar. Fortunately, I was allocated to a very active team, the biggest and the most active one. I'm lucky, I think. It's said there are most Chinese ppl in this team comparing to others.

The things I did today was learning after Khine and Elaine. I touched a little bit about FX, FUT, CASH. The software is Aexoe, 4 prog would be used in the work. I saw Elaine use ART, a magic software.

In our team, Wendy and Patrcik are the two managers.

It was quite messy when I firstly came across lots of data entry and excel creation. The most important thing is to know where to grab the figures and allocate them into proper table. Besides, be efficient and quick minded, be ready to deal with any problems.

It's said Candy would be my tutor or mentor. I will see here tmr. Hope everything's gonna all right.

One more thing, Elaine introduced me to Wang Ran, also our team mate, from Nanjing. He's an interesting guy. Hi, nice to see you all. Hehe.

Tmr should get to work 10 o'clock. Don't know when leave work. However, I really enjoy the atmosphere there. Quite warm quite active.

Keep going.

Where should I go?

2011-03-11T02:20:00.002+08:00

Days passed when I was taking a breathe.
I just gave a glance and it ran away.
Hey, girl, where would you go? Why were you so hurry?

I speed up to catch your pace, but my heart beat follows mine. One year, a lot of things have been changed, except me. I was locked in the beautiful school society and haven't even got involved. Now I am wandering. Anywhere, anytime.

Mr Tan from an accounting firm taught me a lesson, thoroughly, profoundly. He said 审计是一份神圣的职业。 If you don't have such kind of spirit, you will never do it well. As he said, I would feel guilty, if I didn't follow the pure audit career path.

Another bad news from another accounting firm is. They can offer me $2000, but will not help me apply EP, even SP can not, only WP. WP--------work permit!!!!!!!

Reality is reality. I am not super woman. I just wanna cry, for not supporting myself on my own, for not being stronger to burden all of the pressure, and for everything I want to do, but haven't realized yet.

The more days I stay in this island, the more pressure and sorrow I will encounter. It's not a battle with intelligence, but with my own spirit, my mood and my patience. I don't know how I can make it through and when I will recover. I'm really crazy, mad and sad.

Sometimes, I think it will be better if I go back home. At least, I know what direction I shall go. However, after careful thinking, I find I'm wrong. The reason why I thought it would be fine cuz 1. I would be with my family; 2.The so-called direction is what I have not tried yet. I do have hope cuz I don't know the result. I believe in the hope and it definitely will be good. So the result seems to be clear. No matter where I am, I still face the same problem, the same challenge and the same loneliness, even someone is now at my side.

Father asked me about the bottom line. I kept silent. Then he set for me. JUNE. It's JUNE.

CNY in China

2011-02-04T16:23:00.002+08:00

This year, I came back to China. I landed in Shanghai on 10 Jan, headed for Nanjing 14 Jan, south to Shanghai again 17 Jan and then arrived at home Taicang 21 Jan. Immediately, I got a cold. 29 Jan I went down to the coutryside with my family to attend wedding party. 30 Jan my dad invited our relatives to have CNY eve dinner, where I witnessed his congratulary speech for the first time in such kind of circumstance. Then 1 Feb, my brother came back from the army and we held a dinner together in my grandma's house. 2 Feb, the last day of 2010 in lunar year, we gathered together with my father's family in Huang Jing. The next day, we went back home and took a bath. Now I'm sitting in front of the computer, typing all of these trivia.

A Comma

2011-02-04T15:52:00.002+08:00

It's has been 3+ months when I started my job hunting. The frequency of interaction with HR or companies is just like a parabolic curve. A long time of applying, writing resume and cover letters and waiting, then maybe get a chance to have an interview, but at last is rejected.

Some one tells me that until I deliver 100 resume and get 10 interviews can I see my offer. So far, I have been interviewed by Deloitte, Reuters, Bloomberg, DB, RBS, UBS, iCapital, UOB, and Grant Thornton, among which I have been proceeded to the last round for DB and RBS. However, unfortunately, I failed. The month of Novemeber and December were my most tough time, cuz I experienced a lot and also gained valuable lessons.

I really like the culture that DB expressed to me, including its treatment as I came to the office. The reason that I was rejected was the intervewers considered that I felt struggling when I understand their questions.

As for RBS, I thought it would be my destination and I believed I performed well in AC. I well handled the technical part, but I'm afraid the group exercise might brings about my failure. Well, it was my first time to have AC and I must confess that I didn't pose myself well in this group discussion. I behaved just like a complementary person, who didn't have his own opinion. More precisely, I acted as a helper, not a manager.

My last interview was with UOB, which was just the first round for MA prog. I treated it as normal and didn't take it quite serious. The interviewer talked with me only for 13 minutes, but I successfully enrolled to the second round that is online test. However, I don't feel satisfied as I do it. I did it in China.

All of these interviews really gave me a lot to think about myself and about how to handle different cases. I find that no one is born to be an excellent interviewee. Practice makes perfect. The saying really do!

When I spent CNY at home, I received an email from P&G and asked me to contact them as I am back to SG. They tranferred me to Finance Department. It's really a long story. Last year, I attended their written test and passed. However, they think I am not fit for the CMK position. There was a interlude. I sat for the exams but found the position code I applied did not contain finance dept. That's the reason why I chose CMK, which was the only dept I heard before. Thanks to P&G HR side, I will have another chance.

Another news is from a supplier of wireless system. They called me yesterday night from India and may be going to have me interview as I go back to SG.

Job hunting is a long way, but I don't want it to be too long. In this year, I will be much harder to catch my first step into the society.

My first REAL test with SGX

2010-10-08T04:48:00.003+08:00

Today, well, not today, but yesterday. Actually, it was on 7 October, 2010. I greeted with my first ability test with SGX. First of all, I'd like to thank SGX to give such a precious chance to get involved in the real job hunting environment and also to have been the first company to give me a good reply. Just on 6 October, I received the reject email from Accenture side, but it's okay for me. The reason was "I don't meet their qualification level.". I guess it was because of my low GPA for my master degree, but it's okay. I don't mind.

I just want to keep a record about my way going to be positioned. So it's a good start.
The ability test was consisted with two parts, one was numerical test and the other was verbal test as most of banks did before they got you to interview.

Before the test, a guy called Yi Feng just gave us a brief introduction upon the reason why we were invited to sit there. He talked a little bit about the Management Associate Program and the process of candidates selection. What most impressed me was defenitely the number they probably would hire for this year. Actually, he didn't say the exact number, but he showed the number in previous year, which were 13 altogether, among whom were 3 from NTU, 3 from NUS and 7 from SMU. It seemed to be really severe.

Okay, after the introduction, we began to be tested. Here we got another guy. Sorry, I forgot his name, but I guess he's from Pakistan. He mannered sophiscatedly as he read the instructions and regulation clearly and carefully. He also didn't bother to state why he did so was to make sure the two sessions of ability test could be held as same as possible and then people would not make any complaints about the fairness of the process or external factors.

Let's begin. The problem booklets were designed by SHL. First was numerical test. It was a little different from what I used to practise. Firstly, the diagrams were all in one page. Secondly, all of the questions were messed, not in order with the coresponding diagrams. So when you read the question, you should locate the correct diagram first. Thirdly, for every questions, there were 5 or 10 options, which were more than any of my previously sample tests. The second part was verbal test. I should finish 48 questions in 25 minutes. I forgot how many questions for numerical test, but I remember verbal's, because it was really a lot for this part. There were 12 paragraphs and each had 4 questions. Frankly speaking, the test was not too difficult, but the time was not enough, at least for me.

After the test, I just got an idea to do numerical test in this kind. I could first highlight the key words for diagram 1 and then pick up all the questions upon this diagram, then to deal with the diagram 2 in the same way. However, if I applied this method, another problem might be raised up, which was that I must be clear about the number for the questions. It is highly possible that I messed all of the questions again and what is wors that I can not get to be right even I obtain the correct answer if I circled the wrong number.

I feel like this kind of test is not only to evaluate your calculation and understanding skills but also to see whether you are able to handle your emotion such as persistence, patience and calmness. Maybe the latter is what I am now seriously short of. I am able to do it correctly in a relaxing environment. However, as long as I am squeezed, I feel nervouse and mistakes get to be more. This is my shortage and I have to improve.

Well, anyway, win or not, is no longer important. My virgin test is like this. I hope I will get more although really anxious about it. However, still wish to see the email inviting to proceed to the next stage. =)

Hey there!

2010-10-04T01:55:00.003+08:00

Long time no see, blogspot. The last entry was in June and now it's October.
I finished my midterm exam, really hard and decided to take ACCA exam, only two paper. Job hunting is still ongoing, but no reply.
The day before yesterday, I helped Angela with Talent Test, but failed.
I hesitated to make decisions. Leave or not.
Hey Han, how to define the relationship between you and me. Have you decided alr whether I will be the only one you want to spend your rest whole life with? I'm sorry I really can not make sure. We have lots of disagreement. However, I think it's not your fault, it's all because of me. I just don't want to have relation with anybody, so I am too rude to you.
Father said, I should decide whether to continue with you cuz if not so it's waste of time for you and it's not fair for you. What do you think about it? Why don't we just stay apart for a period? Why don't you understand? Why don't you agree?

Okay, it's not the most important issue at present. Finding a job is really more vital for me. So just put you aside. I'm sorry. Maybe I have to decide and the day I think will come soon.

How Time Flies.

2010-06-14T00:54:00.004+08:00

Still have got 5 minutes left for the next brand new day, I am waiting for the match at 2:30. "Time is flying." It has been quoted in many blogs of mine. It's not just an saying, buy a real feeling. The year I stayed in Singapore is the fastest time I've ever experienced in my life. Amanda said that's because I was fighting hard and striving for what I want. That's true.

Tomorrow, she's going to Goshman for her internship. I wish you all the best and I believe you will do a good job there. Your patience and tolerance really encourage me, but I can not persuade myself to follow you and learn from you. I know you are a good example, but I am not willing to be same with you even if I wanna be in bank industry. I don't why.
Sometimes you say you admire me and my life. I say everyone has his own lifestyle and every pattern has its difficulties. It's just because you don't want others to know or. It's nonsense. Whose life is perfect? Han says I don't care what to wear, what to eat or where to stay. Then, what do you care most?
Last time I went home was in December 2009. 6 months has passed. I don't miss home, but I don't wanna stay in Singapore. Just set me free out of SG a little while, even 2 days.
Okay, I make a decision here. I must be off from SG next week.

A fierce emotion

2010-05-28T18:54:00.002+08:00

It's a nice day today cuz we have got Public Holiday and I don't need to go to work. Scarcely, I ate breakfast with Han. Last night, we planned to take HK breakfast in the morning and we did. It was comfortable with you in such a warm morning. In the evening, we will have a full supper with his brother. Today's really beautiful.

As for my intern, it has been nearly one month. Now I don't feel embarrassed when I was working. Things that assigned to me get gradually more and more. I really appreciate that they can rely on me. Keeping a record of what I've done everyday is a must for me now. As I do more, I find it not so difficult to handle. The only thing must be considered is CAREFUL.

There's one feeling not so satisfied that is DULL & LONELY, especially on Saturday. What for? I've no idea. It's said that "at least, you are with Han". Things are not easy. I can not feel he's beside me even if his body is lying aside. I don't know why. Maybe we get together just because we want the body. I don't know.

About My Intern

2010-05-17T23:04:00.003+08:00

My internship was from 5th May 2010, just after the last exam on 4th May. I pushed myself to give up the last summer vacation, the trip to Europe and the chance to go back to China. In order to be so called prepared for future job hunting, I applied for an intern like accounts. Actually, this position is something dealing with accounting. I was offered this job by AWWA, Asian Women's Welfare Association, an NPO, non-profit organization. It's indicated that the job is audit assistant.
Every day, I get into office at 9 o'clock and leave at 6. It will take me one hour to get there, but it's worthwhile. I could smell the working people's emotion. Usually, it's quiet in the train in the morning and noisy at dawn. In the morning, some ladies makes up faces, some read newspaper, some take a snip. Everything is in order. As long as you step out of the train, people all rush to the exit. Some need to transfer, some walk to the office, some wait for others.
It was fresh for me on the first day. I dressed well with some perfume in order to be professional and sophisticated, but still can be recognized that I was just a new man in this area. First day was excited and nervous, cuz I was afraid to misunderstand others' saying, I tried my best to absorb everything I heard, and I got very tired home. The first week passed quickly and the key word in this week was TIRED. Maybe I had not been out of the exam period.
However, after two days' sound sleep at home on weekends, I got full energy to go back to work. I did feel quite well. This department is totally different from what I used to stay, because it is so crazy and excited in the working hour. I like this atmosphere really. I love this kind of job environment. I knew Gloria, Seira, Leah, Yani and Caroline. Thanks you all to attend to me.
I carefully listened to the assignment, in case to forget and also keep diary for what I've done every day. It is very useful to me.
Gradually, I get used to this office and the people. I like it and you all, hahaha.

Today, Gloria assigned me to prepare letters for auditors. Done. TMR continue. Although, I complained on the phone with the job, I know I like this kind of working hour. I must confess that I am still thinking about going out for a trip. I hope I will do well in the rest of days.

Note to myself, I book BTT on 25th June and graduation ceremony will be held on 12th July. So I need to ask for leave of these two days.

in less than 7 hours, I will be finally sitting for the last exam

2010-05-04T05:29:00.002+08:00

So far I am satisfied with my previous two exams, although I don't the exact results, I could feel they are at least better than mid term. In less than 7 hours, I will be finally sitting for the last exam. I am really tired of exams. However, I will go fro work from 5th May, as soon as I finish my exam. I am really harsh to myself. I could ask to start later, but I refused to set myself free. And I also am not able to travel in Europe and I don't know when shall I realize this trip.

Actually, I tend to type in Chinese, cuz I really mis Chinese characters. Now I am listening to Mian Hua Tang's song, 2375, the last song of its album. Well, I'm tired. I have to deal with work, love, study and hobby. What's the order? Which one should I focus on first? As soon as I well dealt with one, others will emerge. I have no rest for any second.

I don't want to marry, cuz it's a symbol which indicates I am getting old and I have to take some kind of responsibility, called FAMILY. I don't want to be annoyed by real world. I'd like to live a life in my own little world, that is taking some photos, doing something I love, not too heavy. I don't want to compete with others. I don't want to squeeze into a higher position in a so-called BIG company, especially investment banking industry. I don't want to do anything. It's maybe because I am tired of doing anything.

The last words MIAN HUA TANG sings: plz take me home, take me home. Well, where is my home? This summer, I will not be at home. I thought it was nothing, but it seems to be something as time being. Maybe I am just a little bit home sick, but I just don't wannt speak it out, cuz as I spit my words, the feeling of uncomfortable to stay here will be even stronger. Keeping silent is just a way to leave me alone and preventing from home stuff.

Well, I haveto go to bed or I will lose this final exam. Good luck to me!
After the exam, I think I will be here more.

Am I defeated?

2010-04-21T05:15:00.003+08:00

It's about our project. It's about another one's gain. It's about lowing my head.

LKY's project has been finally done. Thank you Angela. I did contribute, but I had little to spill out. I have to confess I have little sense to INTERNATIONAL affairs. When you told me to do this do that, I am silent. When I was with someone who has strong personality, I kept silence. Someone said I just lost my confidence. Is it a JUST case? Or through these years, I have already been as normal as lots of people are? Well, the only thing that I did not do is I didn't let my tears roll down. After that, I took a little think about it and found myself just a kid, or like a kid. I don't even want to explain. In my mind, ok, well, let it be ba. Everytime I do something, I think no one cares. Is it because I have been defeated?

When I heard that Amanda got the opportunity in Gosh. I could even hardly spell the famous investment group name!!!! Okay, that's it. Somebody knowing that group will understand what I am talking about. I appreciate her passion on continuing to improve herself. As long as she find other's ads, she will follow, not simply mimic, but absorb and let it be her own ability. Is it a good attitude to the world and to the people around us? Is it a good way to improve oneself? I can hardly imagine that I am just doubting such thing. Several years ago, I must have taken every good benefits to get access to what I want to be or get. However, now, I have been changing. Who changes me? Me? The environment? I always think other's advantages are just their unique gene. I don't even consider to learn from them. I always think I am living my own life. Since I seem to find my own position in the world, why did I feel sad about other's success? Am I just jealous? Imbalance in mind? Why?

Two ways fix myself. One, first clear up nonsense. Take a good think about people and things around you. Classify them into two parties. One is useful and another is useless at least now is. Then, focus on the useful one. I think if I take this method. I will have to 1. break up with Han; 2. find a place to sleep at night; 3. improve my online test ability without any hesitation; 4. be ready for no marriage; 5. give up my photography. The other way is that persuade myself to self full filling, which means fit myself in. Getting a clear picture who I am indeed, then make a plan for myself.

Let me just go back to the time before came to singapore. My plan is 1. get NUS master degree; 2. achieve ACCA certification; 3. get a job in DBS; 4. continue to take photos until I die; 5. don't want to burden the pressure caused by raising up kids; 6. no matter do what kind of job, just for support my photography life. However, really a trigger!!! such kind of things are a little mixed with my feelings and thoughts. I clearly remember that late in the year of 2008, I held a firm target to enter investment banking industry. But early in the year of 2009, after I met Uncle 3, my idea about life was totally changed. The attitude was kept until I came to Singapore and I found myself lost ambitious goal. How could I be like this? Is it a good attitude to life? I am still too young. Is it enough to cease my running life?

Since I learnt such a kind of things, accounting, finance, economics, I should do smt upon them ba. If finally, I devote myself to art. Still I will not be surprised. Maybe it's really my destination. Who knows?

I can't think too much. Recently, there's another big problem need to solve, but I'm now in examination mood. I couldn't spare too much time on it. So put it aside. Everything will be discussed until I finished my exam. Anyway, the final is really important for me. So my conclusion here is what I was talking above is totally shit. Forget all about it. One thing I should keep in mind that you have your finals!!!!!!! Remember, everything can be changed before you decide to do. Thus, I contribute for good result and those sub-important problems are kept to be dealt with later and they are remaining unchanged. I don't need to bother whether they will affect.

Finally, god bless my exams.

香港读研的清华毕业生的感悟（转）

2010-04-15T03:07:00.000+08:00

香港读研的清华毕业生的感悟（转）

我感觉自己的状态很像这个人。

ingredients

2010-04-13T22:36:00.001+08:00

ingredients, originally uploaded by ˇGladys Gāo.

My 2010 No.5 film roll. This is one of my favorites. It's shot on Amanda's birthday, 8 March, 2010.

paradise theatre

2010-04-13T22:29:00.002+08:00

Bagheria, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Castelbuono, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Cefalù, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Chiusa Sclafani, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Lascari, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Palazzo Adriano, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Rome, Lazio, Italy


Santa Flavia, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


Termini Imerese, Palermo, Sicily, Italy


It's a list of the movie scenes. I want to go there and take a look at it.

JB, a man from GD.

2010-03-23T02:01:00.002+08:00

Well, 2nite I came across a man in Economic QQ Group by accident. So far don't know how to describe this guy. He lived in SG 3 years ago and now is in USA. It's amazing we talked for over one hour on the phone. Both of us are bored? Actually, we have a lot to do. I have to review my courses. During the conversation, I suddenly find I am a little interested in what I am studying now. Well, it's good.

Amanda suggested we should speak in English from now on. I think it's a good idea.

When I mentioned YIAN city. I asked why it's not called Takashimaya Polytecnic. He laughed. Okay. Don't get any conclusion of others. U are yourself, aren't you?

Here, a week passes by.

2010-03-22T03:07:00.003+08:00

Hey, Monday. You are coming. I still am awake. Do you know?

The discussion in photography qq group was active and friendly tonight. Such kind of atmosphere seemed to be unfamiliar to me, cuz normally most of them talked about machines. Machines do matter but they are not at the first position.

Last week, Mr. Chou helped me to scan my film rolls. I will see how they look like soon. Here are some samples.

If the color can be like this, I will smile, but it won't I guess. So don't expect too much, I know. Maybe I have to scan again with advanced machine. Well, thank you very much Mr. Chou.

I'd like to be an artist if I could. I don't wanna study Econ. It's boring. Well, something really differs from what I used to plan. Is it good or bad? Am I to tolerant with myself and free myself? Is he a good choice? Is it right to live with him? So far it's not bad, but several months later.... I don't know. Does he really wanna marry me? Maybe not. Hehe....

Well, don't think too much. Have fun with study and cameras.

I'm getting closer to the other side.

2010-03-21T01:36:00.003+08:00

Well, midterm is over but I still don't know one of the results. Whatever, it's over.

Recently, I find several interesting things.

First, I get more and more bored with my Master courses.
Second, I am eager to return to where I used to be. I mean my major financial accounting.
Third, my life with Han is very important. It makes impact on me every day.
Forth, I got my first interview in my life with BSH. It's about a project. I don't know whether I could be offered the intern. Whatever, it's my first time. There's one thing I feel grateful that is, my first interview was with a nice CFO and the questions were not so embarrassing.

After the midterm, I find myself get used to such kind of life with some guy. It's all my fault. I think it's not good so I am not willing to do anything for it. However, actually, it's not too bad as I thought. I shouldn't consider it too serious. Live for you and make you happy. Really.

I don't know whether I could do better in my final, but I will try la.
Thank you J. I think that day we hang out was great. You taught me a lot about how to think about our life indeed.

I thought I had already been ignorant to everything. I don't like to change. I don't like to follow others. I don't like to learn from others. Well, does it really matter?

What kind of life do you really want? Two kinds of different world of myself are what I pursue. Life for myself.

one left

2010-03-04T00:23:00.004+08:00

Okay, I must confess exam is not just exam. It is a kind of alarm, which remind me of hardworking. Well, yes, I didn't focus on studying from the start of this semester till now. I am totally wrong. Now I realize it and I hope it not too late.

Actually, I wanna say to Jennifer that I saw one of you blog about portfolio lecture. It seemed that you were hurt by some body. I commented on that with 5 rows of words. But as I clicked ENTER button, it quickly shifted me to a web showing WRONGLY CONNECTED. You know, how depressed I was then.

I know I am not the best one, but I wanna be the better one in my life.
Someone always bullies me on my fat body, stupid mind and little nips. Okay, as this happens, I quickly get an idea to break up.

He said he would go home this summer and the landing city will be Shanghai. I know his ex-gf is now working in Shanghai. Besides, she suggested they should be set up relationship as before again. So will something happen in this case?

One day I find that, if I lost my cellphone or cant login qq, we would lose touch with each other. I told him about the idea. He showed no reflection. Okay, well. This is the first boy that I don't wanna know all about him, even more about him. The more I know him, the more difficult I can withdraw from this love. Am I right doing such things?

Tonight, as I got off the train and walked to the busstop, a guy stopped me and advertised Standard Chartter's Visa card to me. At the very first, I kindly said, "no need la, thx." Then he stepped closer and insisted to talk with me about this kind of card. Okay well. I have to say"Sorry la. I'm not quarlified to apply such Visa card, cuz I'm a foreigner and also a student." Then, he stopped talking. Hehe. I went home. Sometimes it's a good opportunity to be a foreign student, but sometime not at all.

I still have one more mid-exam. Add oil G, although you did not very well in the last one. Anyway, sun will rise tomorrow as usual. =)

Can you believe I am still awake!

2010-03-02T03:22:00.002+08:00

My midterm exams are coming. First is on Wed and another on Fri. I have been living in this house for one month sharp. Gradually, I get used to the life style, that is sleeping in daytime and work at nite. And now I'm reviewing my lecture note. What about him? He just stepped out of the door for cooking! -.-

Time never waits ppl. From the start of this semester, 11th Jan, I experienced moving, dating and hanging out in HK. As I put those travel stuff aside, I realize the exams are coming. What did I learn? Seems nothing. A little fortune is that I am able to pick up those missed lessons. Is it because lectures are easy or I am more capable? I hope the later reason matters.

But there is still a bad news. My body is not well. It may be messed up, cuz my clock is almost set upsidedown. I hope I can change it after the exams. I really can not be irresponsible for my own body.

Unitl now do I realize that nights are not so lonely.

Crazy Sydney

2010-02-28T09:32:00.001+08:00

Crazy Sydney, originally uploaded by H.M.Lenstalk.

This is a picture taken in the celebration of Lesbian and Gay in AU. Ppl really wanna express their sex liberation. I can feel the excited moment. This shot really shocks me. See the eyesight. A little drunk, but fortunately he has a shoulder.

The whole album is recommended by H.M.Lenstalk. I like this kinda human shots. Share with you guys.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/summilux-m/sets/72157623519199392/

The dashboard changed

2010-02-25T18:38:00.003+08:00

As I opened my blogspot, I found it changed its dashboard formation. It's not too difficult to get used to it. It's okay la.

Hav u eaten such kinda biscuits?

2010-02-24T00:38:00.002+08:00

这种饼干你还记得么？, originally uploaded by ˇGladys Gāo.

Do u remember such kinda snacks? When I was a child, I ate them and loved the sweat candies on the top. It really surprised me when I saw it. I think I will buy another package. =)

Feel tired 2day

2010-02-23T19:02:00.002+08:00

I went 2 bed 4 am and got up 10 am. I felt sleepy after lunch as usual. 2day, after class, I made a mistake that I took the train in wrong direction. Bt I realized it as soon as I got on the train and just after one stn I got off. huhu.....
Well, Adam Charles is such a nice professor and I think I should not sleep in his class. Bt I was sooooo sleepy then. My head was hanging down again and again. I was not nodding .......-.-

However, I was still awake, really!

Well, say to myself fighting a! midterm exam.

L V

2010-02-23T00:30:00.001+08:00

L V, originally uploaded by ˇGladys Gāo.

It has been long time since I stopped shooting. Errrrrrr... abt 2months ba. Last August I took a similar photo with R10 @ Orchard Rd. This photo was taken last Dec. It's not because I love this brand, but the window gallery is decorated so well to be taken pics.

can not feel myself

2010-02-23T00:16:00.002+08:00

Mr Albert Hu sent us an email to remind us of midterm exam. Well, it will be on 1 March. Only one week left, bt I still can not feel the right mood for studying. Whatav I don? Whatam I doin now? It seems that my life loses its motives. However, I know the most important thing is that I havnt organized everything's well, including the timetable. Although I am with u, I could not totally follow your step. One day you desert me and I find myself nothing but an idiot, what should I do? Okay, keep gg a Gggggg.

love or to be loved

2010-02-22T04:55:00.002+08:00

9:30 pm, 21 Feb, 2010, I was called by Naomi. She was crying and I suddenly realized it was not good. Then I rushed there ans acompanied her drinking in Chinatown. And now I'm sitting in her room. She's finally tired and sleeping.

The incident was that she broke up with Jeetu, an Indian guy with American residence pass. They knew each other through internet and set up relationship last August. Oh, it's already five months since they decided to be together.

Actually, at the very begining, I could not accept such truth. Cuz he's an Indian and you two just talked online for less than one month. But then you fell in love, although you didn't tell me. However, the dating frequency told all. But graduelly, I put it aside, cuz I think it was your choice and I was not entitled to assess whether it was good or not. If he fitted your appetite, why should I say this that any more. As long as you two are happy with each other, none of my business to assert anything. So I kept silence and let it be.

However, today, she told me they broke because of lots of misunderstandings which happened before. He thought she didn't understand him and always asked to do smt unreasonable, while she considered he didn't focus on her, the only girlfriend and she thought he might have other gf.Even if they were not lovers, they still flurt with each other, cuz she saw the chatting history unconciously.

Well, what should I say? Of course, I said smt bad on that guy cuz she was very angry. But then I found still she'd like to be with him. So I told her there would be chances. But it depended on his reply.

I could not help thinking about myself. Even now I duno why I am living with Han. Nor do he. Really? I've no idea. But I know he's different from what I've met before. Because he has a power to control me. Yes, he is that bad boy. Mr Tu Shui Ping has said what I need is a bad boy. He must be beyond my willness to control and just like a lion, give commands, which force you to do, neva disobey. Well, he's kinda like this. Smt wierd is that I'm not curious about his past, his ex-girlfriends, his family bkgrd, his feelings with my and his reason why stays with me. I take it easy and let it be. No matter what it will happen, I am able to be free to withdraw from this love story. So far, I am and it is. But I can smell smt tiny is changing. He becomes to be mild and considerate on me. He has asked me several times whether I will marry him. The answer is never given cuz I don't wanna think about the marriage. Then I pretended to be sleepy every time he asked. My theory is that if you wanna marry me, do smt, just do as you said, don't waste your mouth in cheating me. I believe what I've seen and how I am feeling. So I didn't take serious about all you said. Of course, those housing-stuff is exception.

Naomi asked me why things became so complicated. Words you said are not what you really mean. Once I'd like to try hard to understand what they say and be considered carefully. After I met Neak, I found the true function of words. That is to express your feeling acurately. Words offer an easier way to know others. Why should we make them complexed? We speak out cuz we wanna some one know us. So be as clear and easy as possible. Then I have changed and become insensitive. Gd or bd? I will see.

I thought Naomi was strong enough to burden all, but I was wrong. She is really just a little girl. Maybe she will grow up through this experience. But who knows what the final result will be? We will see.

It’s HK.

2010-02-14T01:55:00.001+08:00

If not because of Yanzi’s concert, I will not see you. So I’m grateful for your coming and the fantastic concert. I believe you had the same feeling with me.

I picked u up at the airport, finding you become slimmer. Well, you suffered and you will gain. We slept in a room, bt nothing happened. You said my sleeping pose was cute. I’ve no idea. I guess nothing happened. You gave me a piece of jewelry, bt I dunno how precious it is. I was totally moved then. I know my eyes were shining with tears, bt you will never know. We really had a wonderful time that night. Especially, after the concert, we hang out along the Nathan Rd from Wang Jiao to Jian Sha Zui. Those delicious foods fascinated us much. We almost forgot the time. Really happy with you. I remember one of Dido’s song, called Thank You, and then I really thank you. You are my best gift as the celebration of Spring Festival. The next morning, you got up very early, cuz you had to fly to Beijing to meet friends. Well, I understand. I put on my jacket without washing my face and sent you away. I followed you until you got into the taxi. I think I would miss you. At last, we gave both a hug. Bye. See you.

In the following days, I lived in Regal Riverside Hotel, which is in Sha Tin district, a little far from the city. Anyway, I met Bolong Li and his girlfriend. They are cute and nice. I looked Hong Kong Chinese University around in the night with Li. Although it was a little cool, we still talked a lot and I found the school was rich in history and lots of its designs are of careful ideas. Hey Li, the way you have chose is a correct way so far, so go ahead and let you suffer ba. On the next day, Li and his gf invited me to have a dinner in a famous restaurant, named Mei Xin Huang Gong. HK’s sacks are really really delicious and soften my heart and mouth. Even I got to the airport, I still found a place to order the dumplings again. Thank you two. It’s my honor to meet you and know you two. Besides, I wish you happy forever and ever. In the afternoon, I went to Shen Zhen, because I didn’t get the visa for HK and Macau. It’s a way to visit HK without the visa. Well, Shen Zhen, alike HK, bt still I feel the smell of mainland. There’s much to talk about Shen Zhen. When I came back to HK, I went to Jin Zhong. Fortunately, as I stepped out of the MTR, I saw the building, Zhong Yin Da Sha. It’s a bit pity that it rained heavily. The weather was always not good during my visit. Does it mean I must come again? If it does, I am willing to.

Something crazy was that I was doing my homework as I was back to the hotel. Even myself cant believe that I was able to hold the mood and calm down to deal with the assignment. However, I made it and not bad. Here, I’d like to thank Zhou Yin. If not you, I will not complete my work. Btw, the phone call was very expensive! What’s more, thank you LNN. If not you, I will not smoothen my affection and went through all the difficulties. Although your voice was not so attractive, it was a good noise to make my concentrate.

I thought HK is more or less the same with SG, bt I was wrong. They are totally different and I can feel the specific smells of each area. When I came to HK, I feel free. I dunno why. Is it because I was with Zhu? Or HK is definitely more liberated than SG. As for the construction, HK seems to be more human, while SG prefers to be industrialized and civilized. So when I was walking in the narrow lanes, I felt ppl’s mood. Their voice, their shouts, their action and their eyes contribute to the whole HK flavor. And at last, I wanna say HK, see you then, with someone.

I must go on and on

2010-01-30T00:04:00.002+08:00

It has been more than one month since I wrote my last post. Well, a lot happened in this period. Yes, I fell in love with some guy after the trip. I spent the Christmas Day with him and after that I went back to China. The days in China really are tight. I met Yuan Mo. I went to Nanjing and slept with Yael. I went to 3 cafe and saw Seven and Uncle 3. Well, I miss you all. After that, I went to Zhou Zhuang. It was really an amazing jouney. I met some ones who may change all my life and thanked Miss Pan indeed.

However, when I was back to SG, I found everthing changed. I am not living in this place alone, 'cos I have you beside. We almost broke up with each other, bt I saved. Is is neccesary to save? I dunno.

Forget it. Say LNN. Well, we had a good time together. I really miss you guy. I found us getting closer when we met after over 1 year. I hope we can go on and on.

Next, say my study. I really give up and take 3 modules this semester.

Finally, say my new sleeping bed. I will move to Woodlands and start a new life there. Hope everything's going smoothly.

oh yeah~ I'm back

2009-12-19T11:10:00.001+08:00

those about my tour is to be continued
I haven't got those feeling organized. bt soon la.

gladys st

2009-12-02T01:11:00.001+08:00

gladys st, originally uploaded by ˇGladys Gāo.

I love this post, 'cos my name is on.
I am definitely a sensitive person. I decide to go there as soon as I see it. Thx Mr. Bernie. It's long until you take a shot of it and send to me.
It's different, really. I mean seeing my name on the road.

Hey you guy, plz wait. I will be there some day.

Change a layout and chage a mood

2009-11-30T01:35:00.002+08:00

Even the whole world loses confidence in me, I must trust myself. I can't be defeated and do nothing any more.

Just change a more aggressive layout to stimulate myself.

Here is the previous one.

ten years

2009-11-30T00:39:00.002+08:00

If I can live for 100 years, there are only 10 phases of "ten years". Simply TEN!

Here is a report about those first 123 teens of SM2 coming to Singapore.
http://www.zaobao.com/xhd/pages/xhd091116.shtml
Looking at the photos, they seem to be in Singaporean mood. Anyhow, those ten years can change people. Let alone they were just junior students when they came. They even didn't have any general idea about this world.

I, stay here for just 4+ months. I clearly remember I came here because 1, I wanna change my life and broaden my views; 2, leave that place full of memories. I don't even consider to be back. Home, that so-called home, is just a place, some people living there and full of childish records. It seems that I don't miss that place, but I have bought a ticket home. Why? I don't know. I just think it is necessary to do so. How come? No reason.

How long will I stay here? I'm not afraid of being here. Adversely, I'm scared to be driven away. It's difficult to stay here. Why do those guys always smoothen me saying that it's not so hard to stay? How come? Show me, just show me. Am I not confident with myself? Or I just take it too serious? Maybe.

Now, 1:03 am 30th November, I can say ten years is not too tough for me. It's nothing if I could spread my wings. Really, it's true. I must appreciate this excited experience and those people I will recognize in the rest of time.

Well, okay, give me ten years. Let me set an alarm, ten years, I will see. We will see!!!

Two Nihgts with two boys

2009-11-25T13:25:00.002+08:00

He is Han. Age N/A. Working.

We talked in a QQ group which helping to book tix. At the very beginning, we didn't have much to say. He always briefly wrote those words. Sometimes hard to understand. But now I get used to it. And he began to call me "87". Still, we don't know each other.

Very quickly, we met 1st time at East Coast. I think it's 9th November. After my class, we gathered at XX mrt and then took a taxi there. Finding a bench and sat down all whole night. We drank not much but I was a little drunk. But we don't do anything just talked a lot. I remembered that what I said were always nothing important to him. Those socalled tough things were all piece of cake in his mind. Many times, I didn't think we got in common with each other. I felt so fainted and forgot what I said. We two smoked 3 packets of cigarettes. He smoked a lot and little did I. He must be addicted to it and I advised him not to do. A little is okay but not much.

He showed little interest with what I said and I felt depressed. He was not interested in stars, talking about friendship, love and work. But one thing impressed, be independent. I get a new view of "independent". That is seperate yourself from others emotionally, selfcontrol and selfadjustment. No one will take care of you for nothing. It's cruel in this world. Don't be so stupid to think some one may help you or correct your mistakes in time. It's you. Your body is in this space but your mind is not.

When the sun rised, we got home and slept. We took the night as a plain day and we will forget all. We don't think it's a special day. Maybe I am a little too serious about it. But time can dye it away.

Several days later, he asked me the most impressed thing happened at that night. Without thinking, "drunk". "87". Again, showed his dissatisfaction. He said, we drank with the same bottle and I was the first one that did so after he came to Singapore. He said "you are special". I don't know what he meant and I answered "I am sorry about that." Why was it my fault? Didn't you hand over that bottle? Don't always distribute it to "drunk". You were clear then, weren't you?

You pat me really hard. too strong. You said you were a little moved when I hug your bag which had your shoes in it. You said I seemed to be a priamary school student. Well, okay. I am not your appetite.

Unincredibly, I agreed to go to Phuket with you. So far, I don't know how this thing is going and will be like. Let it be, anyhow.

One thing, I'm not interested in you and neither are you.

He is Neak. exchange student. born in 89.

Actually, I wrote a lot about him in my another blog. At the very beginning, I recorded everything I did with him. I like him I must confess. But we will never be together, I bieleve. never and ever.

We went for 2012 and many times tears rolled down my cheeks. Crazy we were. We took mrt to Outram Pk and then walked home, I finally took a taxi home though. This night was again my first time to do such crazily.

Some one just sang, there are something mad we call it love. But it's not love. Neak, I like you as an artist likes a work, as an photographer likes her camera.

refused by hsbc

2009-11-24T18:33:00.000+08:00

Thank you for your application to the Local Graduate Programme at HSBC, the world's local bank.

Keen competition and our high standards used to select the future leaders of HSBC mean we only choose a limited number of candidates who meet our stretching requirements.

Despite the good qualities that you have been able to demonstrate, we regret that your application to the Management Development Programme has not been successful.

Thank you for your interest in HSBC and we wish you every success in your future career.

well, I am refused. okay. I know there will be a lot more in the coming days.

feed to twitter

2009-11-22T15:26:00.001+08:00

can I? test

google short bio

2009-11-22T14:53:00.001+08:00

想做文艺青年，没资本。

想做无业游民，没钞票。

想做NB-CFA，路很长。

想学西点，没时间。

迟到。是我的特权。

装B。只是偶然。

窝乱。知道的就表K我。

----------------------------
OMG did I write it? very aggresive bt depressed a ....

Something about my birthday

2009-11-16T01:05:00.002+08:00

I remember that I wrote down :"我要成为牛逼的人." last year. Time really flies fast.
Last year, there has not been snowing in NK.
This year, it has been.
Last year, we were together taken photos.
This year, I'm alone with Amanda.
Last year, I was still looking forward the life in SG.
This year, I am missing home and NK.
....
Neak is the first person sending me regards on the day on 14th Nov. Mr. Xu is the 3rd one. Thank you guys. Especially to Amanda.
On that day, you and me had a dinner @Sakura. We walked along SG River. We talked a lot. You said you remember my no. 'cos I will be the person saving her life when accidents happen. I was moved.

The guy called Han taught me how to be independent. Say, don't care about anyone. Neither of anything. What's more, I'm not so pretty and not the one that disappear, will be missed by anyone. Just like a kind of sand. When wind blows, I will transfer.

I didn't invite Mr Zhou to join us. Because I'm scared of him. Many times, he knows what I am feeling about and he speaks out. Why do you let it out? Can't you keep it in mind? Please I beg you not scare me okay?

Record something
A birthday cake from Breadtalk
Blew candles with Naomi and Lishan
Sakura Japanese food with Amanda
SG River with Amanda and Zhangxiao, last minute on 14th Nov, they sang birthday song for me.
Back home, found a present on the desk from Naomi

Tired though, have to stick to it

2009-11-02T23:48:00.002+08:00

I'm tired. After the midterm exams, I haven't even reviewed all those courses. What am I doing now? Finally, all of the marks come out.
Micro 88
Macro 14
QCM 71
Well, Okay, I can accept the result. Luckily, I'm not far behind those guys. I know I am not the smartest, nor am I the most hardworking. The score deserves what I've done. It's always depressed to compare myself with others. I find myself not willing to improve myself. When I see some guys show good talent in some aspects, I don't even envy him/her and I don't want to follow them. It's not because the way they did is not fit for me. I even don't consider whether it is suitable for me. I think it's his/her style. You have yours and I have mine. Just like two parrelled lines. I do something in my way and you do in your own way. No matter what the result is, we just do it. How would I be like this? Is it good or bad? Am I losing myself?
Anyway, it's tough recently. After about 19 hours, I will have our CF group presentation. I hope everything goes well.
I'm grateful Mr. Bag is so kind and nice. He grades me properly and I also show my point of view and my understanding to him. Thank you.
And at last, I wanna say I see rainbow tonight. It's my first time to see such a spot in the evening. Is it amazing? It's really rainbow.
Okay, I must confess, it's not the last thing I wanna record. I wanna go home in Dec. But the willness is not so strong. If anyone stimulates me a little, I may go ahead and book the flight ticket. Whay am I so hesitated?
Last at last, talking with WY is nice. I told him I was once shocked by him and I now still appreciate him.
Okay. That's all.

Maybe I'm not fit for a banker.

2009-10-23T00:12:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, I attended an event for women in bank. I asked a stupid question. It's the very basic knowledge of investment bank department. Once I opened my mouth, I was regretful sooooo much. How could I ask such a silly question in such an occasion!!! And then, Amanda and I went to Liang Seah Str to have a cup of tea. We talked a lot, life, career and love. I found that I am really not fit for investment bank. To be positioned in an investment bank, one must be so enthusiastic, smart and energetic. I confess that I am energetic and enthusiastic, but I am not smart enough. It's quite true and I'm not be modest. I don't have a quick mind to think about the incidence. So what do I have? I have calming mind. I like to make plans before I get started. I have good background of financial management. I wanna do something related to project assesment. So where could I be positioned in a bank. Acturrlly, I really want to get a job in a bank. It needn't to be in an investment bank, but just a bank, private or merchant? I dunno. Maybe I really should focus on ACCA. I dunno.

survive

2009-10-08T02:46:00.001+08:00

New Asia is a good place, but make me feel nervouse. I can't help considering how to survive in this city. At the 70th floor, I see a lot acturlly, but not clearly. It's all blur for me and all the buildings are the same. When we just got past HSBC, my heart beat and I know I really want to be positioned there. I'm always complaining it
difficult. Maybe I shall change the attitude. Just try and don't give up. Am I easy to be satisfied? I dunno. About what? For what? Is it good for having a low point of happiness? I must be eager to get some nice job here, but I don't even show such willingness. So what happens to me on earth!!! Does it u bring me like this, ignorant for anything, including my dream!!! Is that u??? Plz do tell me!!! Omg. How to let my indeed aspiration come out? How to be back where I used to be? Never step into the same two river. So what? I couldn't get back any more? Oh shit! Where I am now? Wasting life time and just waiting for death? Is it really what I want? No! Totally no! I need more. It's not enough.

I see the lights shining in the distance. Some people will be stimulated by such gorgeous city. However, I smell the crisis and afraid to be lost. Everywhere is shining with opportunaties, but they don't belong to you. How to get one? How to survive? It's more likely for me to consider everyday as the last I live in this world. In this case, I will cherish time and what I have more.

It's still confused me or maybe annoyed how to survive? How?!!! Looking at the city in the dark, I feel depressed. Oh! Where is my life? Is it so far?

Have finished midterm exams

2009-10-06T04:15:00.000+08:00

Monday to Friday, I was crowded by midterm exams. Macro teacher is so
fast that he has already correct all papers and upload scores. I got
14/30, B, below average. I have tried best. I really did. However, it
scared me because I really dunno how to solve the problem. I am not
sure whether Mr Bag will give me some points on Prob 2. I hope so.
Although I did not feel good for Micro, I don't lose confidence,
because the mistake I made will never be made again and I do know how
to do it. I'm not afraid to meet similar question in the final exam.
Well, it all depends. Waiting for the result, I can't stop proceeding to learn.

all the best

2009-09-29T09:59:00.003+08:00

I don't know whether Im okay these days.I did have a not bad time in recess week, bt the closer the exams gets, I feel more anxious. And now it comes and on the process. Carefully thinking about what happened recently, I find myself not in the mood. I've no idea whether there are some links among the things, which will be listed below.
F1 is in process, bt no sound interferes me.
HSBC SH needs some intern, I applied, bt no reply.
Getting a cold, my nose is stuffy.
An unknown man encouraged me study hard, when I was reviewing in campus.
Mr Bernie passed IELTS, while I am unfamiliar with English.
Miss Naomi swings between two guys, bt I come across none.
Taiphoon is pass by, lots of people are suffering, and so am I due to midterm exams, bt in contrast, the first one would must fail.

It's really a hard time. I don't wanna tell MOM. However, I am not young any more and I must try to boarden everything by myself. Anyway, it's not the last day on earth. Be optimism is better than trapped in complaints and pesimistism.

ALL THE BEST

back from night club

2009-09-24T03:06:00.002+08:00

zirca
a disco club by one fullerton hotel
high heeled
played stone, sissors and paper with 3 guys
then went for the 2nd club

It's not as fancinating as I thought. Anyway, I experienced and I free myself tonight. Tomorrow, I still have a lot to review.

Stepping out of the dancing pool, I saw the high building of HSBC. Amanda asked whether there would be a position for me. I've no idea. It's just standing there and like an objective. Come on Gladys. I know I will not get what I want at the very beginning. It must be a long way to go.

I'm suffering.

2009-09-16T01:05:00.003+08:00

I'm suffering, really.
I'm not showing off what I am experiencing. I'm not feeling proud as before.
I am just saying I am suffering. From what? All. All the modules I have taken. Microeconomics, Macroeconomics, Quantitative Economics and Computing Method, Economic Growth and Development, Corporate Finance and GEC! Let me label them according to the series. A, B, C, D, E and F.
First, A's teacher Mr Bag is very very kind and very very carefull to any cases. I admire him and respect him. However, I cannot find anything logical.
Then, B's teacher, from Pakistan, is really nice and speaks no local accent English. I like him very much. Compared to Mr Bag, he makes his lecture straightforward to understand and more logical.
Well, C is an Economietrics subject acturlly. At the very beginning, I found I lost myself in advanced Mathematics and lots of caculation formula of Matrix. I was so confused and I regreted that I didn't care when I was undergraduate. However, gradully, I realise it is not as difficult as I thought, but there's still difficulty to understan lots of therom.
Then, D's teacher, abviouly, is not a teacher in mainstream of economic development. I am confused why he doesn't focus on China when he talks about EA's miracle. In fact, in whole of his lecture, he focuses on EA's development after WW2. So why don't take an account of China? Is it only because it's a big country, which is not in sufficient for resources? I don't know. When lots of people are talking about those big countries' speedy growth, he is just keen on these small countries. Ok. Anyway, I accept. To some extent, I will learn something. Yes I will.
And here, I come to E, corporate finance. I have learnt this subject for 4 years, but I still feel difficult to master it! All of what I've learnt is just a shit! Why can't I benefit from the previous knowledge I've gained? I don't even have any advantages so far. I am really scared.
Finally, F is the English module. It's boring.
So, I don't find any interesting thing from any of those modules. Why am I learning?
Well, I must confess I am now in depression and I don't like any classes so far. I am just complaining. It's not my real consideration. I'm wrong. I am totally wrong. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

To get myself moving, I must tell myself that I have stepped out, even it's just a little. That is, 11 Sep, I first exchanged my ideas with Mr Bag in class, and, 15 Sep, I stood in front of others to explain my views over specific case. I shall try. I must try. Come on Gladys.

night's walk

2009-09-05T00:38:00.000+08:00

--------------------------------------------------------

Yes, I was walking in the dark and reminded me of Avril's song 'I'm with you'. Every time I walk alone, it always emerges in my mind.
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Every night, I walk home under the moon. Today is Friday again. And it's my 2nd time walk home alone. Because Naomi hangs out with some guy. Well, suddenly, I find having a bf is what can be proud of and on the other hand, you would be shamed on if you didn't have one. How could I think it in such a way. Whatever, I've no idea.

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Walk and walk, coincidently, the sign on the ground just told me 'hey! go ahead'. I smiled.
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I ask Charles whether you feel nothing to do sometimes. He says no and he has never been so busy before. Bingo. He's right! So how could I explain those who are fond of hunting for girls or boys. Maybe, they truly have a lot of time. However, I am Gladys and I have to give up some things.

Haven't I realized that I could not get every thing I want? I have already talked about it with Mr Dai in the early this year. Haven't I set my target already? Haven't I promised in front of my parents? So, do rightly and in right time.

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Thus, I was walking along the road, following the sign. Where would it lead me to?

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Thx last weekend's relax, I feel my existence and clearly know what I am doing right now.

I went for Baybeats tonight.

2009-08-30T03:01:00.002+08:00

Yes, I've heard Baybeats before, but I don't know even a band name! So I did some homework and of course, I find some bands are really what I prefer.

●In Each Hand a Cutlass
pure music acoustic Shapeshifter
●Meza Virs
Love Song ＃
●RNRM
electronic music
●Taken by Cars
Shapeshifter ＃

I love #, but I was late because I had to get something to print @ school. Anyway study must be first.

Baybeats. It's really fantastic and amazing. I will go for it next time. Yes, recently I just feel not well, 'cos nothing can stimulate me or I have no inspirations. I don't like such feeling. That's too bad. So I came for the party Friday and this live concerts. And then I tell myself, Gladys, it's time for learning and I will.

This is the last band I enjoyed. Beat! What the greatest is that they just played Hecker's song, Creep, I really really love that guy. His songs are sooooo soft and just like a poem, shi jin. I even burnst into tears at that time. Really really nice. I love it.

This band is called Opposite Party, OP for short. It's somewhat gothic or dark rock. Actuelly, it's not my kind. However, lots of people stand and enjoyed. It was said that they were Singaporean. I've no idea.

I took this photo, just because its color, nice.

What about this guy? RNRM, an Indonesian band, played electronic music, mostly are acoustic. When I entered the stage, they just greeted me and I recognize them. Well, yes, there they are. Some Indonesian elements are used in the music, and it makes the piece more special. I like it. It's really nice.

So much for today's stuff. After the concert, I sms two friends, Zhu and Bernie, both in Aus. What surprised me is that they are both awake! Haha. Let's call it a day and Gladys, you have to do what you have to do. Don't waste time, you know. Add oil.

Kent Ridge Park Shots

2009-08-23T12:45:00.004+08:00

This is my 2nd roll in S'pore. Flowers here remain short but open everyday. They struggle to be nice. The sky here is not always lake blue. People here are friendly.

2 weeks fly

2009-08-23T12:34:00.002+08:00

2 weeks' classes are over and I think I have integerated into the studying cuiconstances. I feel like not shopping and hanging out any more. My 2 points life is just beginning.
In the past two weeks, I stepped into the Carrel room for the first time. It seemed to be perfect but actuelly, it doesn't. Well, I will not use it any more. It's just like a cage and I'm prisoned in it.
I choose 5 subjects. It means no free time in the evening from Mon to Fri. It's good, I think. Push myself running and running.
Last Saturday, I fetched my film roll. It really hurts me, 'cos it has been torn out! How can it be like this? It's all because my fault in rewinding the roll. Oh shit. I can't be so careless next time.
It's 2 weeks I haven't uploaded my new shots to Flickr. Well, I did last night. And finally, I had time to modify my pics and treated them approperiatly.
At the very begining, I felt very difficult to keep up with the pace in class, but now I can. It's just a process, I know.

I've been to IKEA.

2009-08-05T16:59:00.004+08:00

I remember that I've written a blog titled I've been to IKEA. @ live space and now I am typing the letters again, but this time it's in S'pore. Things there are not cheaper than in China. I bought two plastic cases, one glass for flower, one for water, and a floor lamp. And I had lunch there. There are much more to eat. However, I must not go for many times 'cos it'll be a waste of money. I shall control my aspiration.

Tan, different views of Singapore

2009-08-04T22:42:00.002+08:00

This afternoon, I went to Ruby Photo and got my film rolls developed and converted to CDs. And by accident, a man of fame, called Tan were so kind hearted and asked me if I wanna a guider to see around. Yes, it'll be great fun for me. He is very different and very humorous. He taught me how to compose a shot and the keypoints are framing, color homony, composition and telling stories. They are elements of a good pictures. It's really an amazing meeting with such a warmhearted man. I am looking forward the shots he took for me. They must be fantastic.

It's a bustling city.

2009-08-03T11:58:00.002+08:00

I came here 19th July and now it is 3 August. It has been about half a month since I left my home. I'm really starting my trip @ S' pore. Yesterday, I went to Orchard Road again. The theme was shopping. Muji was one of the important destineys. Things there are cheaper than in China. I was a little afraid, 'cos I even couldn't feel the money when I paid. It's horriable!
When I was standing in front of ION, which is full of luxury brand shops, I felt a little bit fainted. What are they doing just sitting down there? Luxury decoration, cool relationship. I couldn't wait. The school is coming today, but I still don't have lessons. Orietation will last for 1 week and modules choosing is on the way. I hope briefing will do some help. Anyway, whatever I choose, I shall try my best to overcome any struggles.
It's a bustling city, but I'm cool brained.

First time to be @ NUS Central Lib

2009-07-29T11:57:00.002+08:00

I'm now just @ the Lib. I do feel good and I love this place.

I'm NUSSTU now!

2009-07-28T20:13:00.001+08:00

I've done my medical examination 22nd July and today I got the report. There is no problem with my blood and chest, but I clearly know what happened to my column and kidney. Playing the violin made my backbone mild thoracic. To some extent, I did devote myself to the art of violin. XD
Anyway, the most important thing is not what the report showed but what I will have got with the report. The line for student pass was very very long, but it didn't take me long to wait 'cos I just arrived early in the afternoon and they just started. However, I still had some trouble with my documents. I haven't got my passport copied and my DBS card wasn't activated. Well, it seemed a little complicated, but I got it through. When I paid online with my mastercard, I referred to my hotmail and unexpectedly saw Ms Low's email, which was about going to take the student card. lol. It's great! Before, I found it difficult to do anything @ campus withou a student card and now I have got it! I'm now a real NUS student!

7.20~7.23

2009-07-24T15:26:00.002+08:00

7.20
-Vivo City (Bak Kut)
-DBS Account
-Supermarket
-Merlion Park

7.21
-NUS
-Orchard RD

7.22
-Registration
-Medical Examination

7.23
-NUS Museum
-Clementi Stn

Here I am.

2009-07-19T16:55:00.002+08:00

Well, I am here and here I am. I'm coming to Singapore and I finally am able to sign in Blogger. I'm really tired typing out what did happen in the past two months. It was suffering but now I have got it through.
Mr. Bernie said I am off-blocked from now on. Well, yes, I'm free. Today is 19th July, 2009, the first day I came to Singapore. When the conductor broadcasted that we would arrived in Zhangyi Airport, I felt a little bit nervous and moved into tears. I didn't know why. It just lasts a few seconds and quickly, I am happy.
I hope everything goes smoothly and I will be happy too.

Bye*2 NTU

2009-04-29T23:57:00.002+08:00

Last night, I recieved the refused letter from NTU adminstration office. It's just a little surprise for me, but, well, fine, it didn't make much trouble. I've already chosen NUS and I've got the offer. Taking it in another way, I'm pretty lucky ' cus I don't have to struggle between two choices.
The email said

We have carefully considered your application but we regret that your
application has not been successful.

The words are so tactful that I don't feel even a little shamed.
At last, it said

We wish you all the best in your future endeavors.

Well, guys, I am refused. Those were all damn shit.
Anyway, thank you for what I've learnt when I was interviewed, for what I've done during the preparation, and for the result you gave me--no choice is the best choice.

I'm counting days and there are no more than 3 months before I go abroad. What will happen to my last 3 months? I've no idea. I wanna shoot more, travel more and read more.

Leave Names In The World

2009-04-28T10:04:00.000+08:00

我一直在走 21:27:57
There are chemical residues suggesting that multicellular life appeared at 1500-1000 Ma.However, these were very small, had no hard parts and upon death rapidly decomposed.The challenge for you if you want to make a name for yourself is to find these critters andSouth Australia is the best place to start looking. There are no Nobel Prizes in geologybut if you found the first soft-bodied multicellular life on Earth, then your Mum would bereally proud of you.
我一直在走 22:20:42
There is no fossil record of these grazing herbivores, something again for you todiscover and make your name in the world as the reaper is too close to me for it tohappen in my career.
Gladys 22:21:37
让人好激动。
我一直在走 22:21:59
第一次读到这么样的lecture notes
我一直在走 22:22:23
leave your name in the world
Gladys 22:22:40
真的。。很很让人感染。
我一直在走 22:22:49
leave our names in the world
Gladys 22:24:42
let's make it come true

Admission To NUS

2009-03-24T17:07:00.000+08:00

Last night, I have just decided to try my best to seek job. This morning, I recieved NUS's admission of Applied Economics. I am sooooo surprised 'cos it's too fast to land in my mailbox. I've already been ready to wait for the offer until May, but it appears! I have not even been checked by any interviews or writing test. How could I believe? I quickly check it with Mr. Zhang and he calls Joan. Well, the fact is true and I am admitted by NUS! Woh.... I thought it would be very difficult and I have been ready but, but, but...
Well, I must consider smth abroad. Hah...

NTU's Interview

2009-03-23T21:30:00.001+08:00

I took an interniew on March 23rd which held by Wee Kim Wee Comunication & Information School. It was in SH. It was not too difficult for me to answer the questions. He asked me the reasons why I would like to choose Singapore and why I preferred KM. According to general answers, I would list the good aspects of living in Singapore and benifits I would take from KM. However, I didn't speak out in that way. Frankly, I confess my true reasons and original ideas. First, Suzhou & Singapore Industry pard. Second, Stefanie Sun. As soon as he heard the name, he surprised. I didn't know what his smile really meant. Maybe, it was bad. He considered me just a big fan of singer star and I would do as those fans do. Maybe, it was really good. He remembered me after. I've no idea.

I was not long since we began our talk. After the interview, I felt a little nervous about the situation I met. There are many more candidates applying for the course than last year. It means much more challenging for everyone.

Have Got Passport

2009-03-18T10:31:00.002+08:00

NTU's Writing Test

2009-03-16T21:07:00.003+08:00

Last 30 minutes, I was taking a test from NTU. It's about a discussion on whether unnecessary use of email messaging is creating work stress and overload. Acturally, I know this test 4 days ago, but I still feel a little nervous when it came up to me. I was recieved the email at 8:10. After I wrote down my profile name I started to think about this question. Well, my roomates do me a favour too. Thx! I listed 2 reasons and 3 improvements. Wish me good luck. Joan said that it'll not be too much problem with my NTU's course. What about NUS's? I preffered that course really. Again, wish myself good luck.

Acknowledgement From NTU

2009-03-10T18:51:00.004+08:00

This is what I've recieved from NTU Studies Office last month. It's just an acknowledgement, not an offer. I am quite clear with it.

______________________________________

It's a little long since I didn't write down anything. I am now just waiting for the coming offer eagerly.

Yesterday, I went to the police station to see to the passport formalities. At the very beginning, it's a little bit difficult for me to get my census register which is kept at school documetary office. I must get at least 3 persons signed before I could borrow it. However, considering the incovenience, my instructor advised me to borrow it for missing ID card. Then, I borrowed my census register easily. Everything went well until then.

When I came to the hall, crowds were waiting in line. There were at least 150 people in front of me. I patiently waited and waited. At last, 10 minutes before it was closed, it was my turn. Fortunately, I got my stuff ready and quickly sent them to the clerk. Suddenly, there was a mistake. She told me my photo attached on the form was not quarlified and I must change it. Well, I didn't understand why it would be not fit in. Anyway, I was shot on the spot as fast as I could. Five minutes later, I came back with my new and so-called quarlified photos to the hall. The previous clerk accpeted my photos and sticked them to the form. By then, I did everything I should do and could do and I would wait until 23rd this month to fetch the real passport.

So, again, I'm waiting for the passport, the offers and the one.

Quoted

2009-02-13T12:44:00.000+08:00

A man knows his companion in a long journey and a little inn.

路遥知马力，日久见人心。

Acknowledgement from NUS

2009-02-06T20:05:00.003+08:00

Just Freak out Let it go

2009-02-03T16:20:00.007+08:00

Er....... Acturally, I even don't know how to decribe the day I spent yesterday in Nanjing. However, it's OK and I'm fine now. It's all about my passport and it began with the rain.

I got on D406 ahead for NJ at 8:13 am. It should not too early for me to wake up at around 6:30, but I was late for no reasons. Oh **!

It rained all day both in TC and NJ. I hate rain from the very moment. The time was limited and Dad drove across the road when it was red. I didn't feel shame really but a little worried about the bills after. Luckily, I got on the train on time and I made myself seated. I had to confess the trip on train was generally peaceful. Thank godness!

Once I stepped out I found the crowd. Oh **! It made me hard to breathe. Well, I sqeezed and I made my way to my campus. I had known there would be no clerks during the winter vacation but I still tried to make a call. There was a sound but no help. According to what she told me, I had to get at least three persons to sign on my certifications if I really wanted to borrow my files paper. Then, I went to the police station to get some help. Of course, I failed. At last, I gave up and I was back home alone.

It's not my fault acturally. I had tried and the process was too complicated. I have to doubt whether it is necessary to confine such complex rules on students' files. Well, it's safe to get the one to sign, but it's a barrier for me to get things ready and back. Maybe it's just my gossip words and they have their reasons to do so. And the most important is that I have to accept it and obey the principles. Meanwhile, I called Mr. Zhang to get some advice. He asked Joan and made sure. Joan said," First, she doesn't have to offer GMAT. Second, it will not be late untill April to get my passport ready. Third, from now it seems there 's not much problem."

However, I didn't feel too bad when I was in NJ, because I called my so call elder brother. He gave me a good message that he would buy a flat in the near future and invited me to go. Sure, I was glad to go.

The end may be a bit nonesense. When I was going through the check gate, one of the passengers struggled with the staff, three gate three men! It was a little absurd to fight at this occasion. I didn't get involved in their quarrel but the worder grabbed my return ticket away. As a result, I could not paste it on my article.

Passport

2009-01-31T15:35:00.002+08:00

I've made a serious mistake that I haven't attended to my passport. As a result, I could not sign up to take the GMAT examination. The official rules show that passport is the only valid document that can be used to take the examination. Accordingly, I must have my passport first.

I realize that time is limited and I have to go to NJ in the early Feb. and see to my passport.

Oh, passport!

Joan said, "I have faith in you."

2008-12-30T16:19:00.002+08:00

It seems that I've done all I should do excepet GMAT. At the moment, I'd like to say waiting is the last but the most important one to me. It's about 3 days I didn't talk with Joan. To come straight to the point, I asked the current situation I met as to application for NUS. The answer was brief and firm--definitely fierce. Although I had known before, I still got a little nervous. I thought to myself that it's obviously a cut-throat competition every year. I have been acustomed to it, didn't I? However, Joan firmly spit words--I have faith in you, which appeased me a lot. Clearly, I have realised that various aspects would lead to different results. At the same time, a fortune may be the key one. Now I recoganize why patience is so vital to get to succeed. I have handed my fate to Joan and Zhang for the time being and I will and must get it back in the near future.

A good news: The tuition fee is S$9000 per academic year and there's no indications that show it will grow.

IELTS report's landed.

2008-12-22T19:48:00.002+08:00

All Files Sent Out

2008-12-13T22:41:00.002+08:00

Recently, I am busy with the preparations of application files and driving.
As to driving, I feel good. It's fine.
As to files, I've made all the referred files prepared and sent them to Mr. Zhang.
I take a breath. Well, they were all delivered. What can I do is just wait for the suggestions from Joan. She should make sure that everything will be ready. Whenever anything needs to suppliment, I hand it over as quickly as I can.
However, one of my friends, younger than me, told me that the tuition fees for NUS and NTU are increasing. I look them up in their websites but there're no information for the coming academic year. I just pray that they could not be too much.

It's Fine Today.

2008-11-26T18:02:00.002+08:00

Well, it's really fine today.
First, I got a drive to my home campus. It was free!
Second, I fetched my translated reports.
Third, the teachers in academic office were not so unpleased. Conversly, they were kind to me and I've got all I need to seal.
Forth, I didn't have even a meal but I didn't feel hungry.

Shit ****

2008-11-25T22:09:00.002+08:00

I've known that all the staff are annoyed. I still could not bear such damn matter, even if I've known all before! How can they stay in their positions? How can they be reliable? How can I believe them? Oh shit! Last Tuesday, you told me to fetch the translation report this Tuesday and I wrote it down on my schedule. However, what've you done to me? You told me I was able to get it only in the afternoon. Why? Why is afternoon? I've no idea. Well, I smiled and said sorry. I calmed down and was tolorent with it. I smoothed myself and I kept my pace to the school busstop. There were too many students who wanna go to JN. Well, I accepted it and I step to the 6th floor, for the elevator was broken down, to seal. Oh shit! This guy was soooooo ugly that I could not give him a glance, but I had to. OK. I had to get him to seal on behalf of the biz department. Suddenly, he asked me to leave a copy there. I realized it would not be going smoothly. I didn't have additional copies, so I was so sorry for not giving him one. He looked a little angry and sticked to it. OK. I was defeated. I found I was just like a dog! "So may I use the print machine to have a copy, please?""Sorry, we don't have the responsibility to help you." Oh shit! It's okay for and I've told the seal would be held in JN this afternoon. Finally, I finished all the mess in our home campus. Actually, I didn't do anything!

2pm~4pm I was busy scanning my certifications and PS them. After that I went into the adim office and got some of my certifications to seal. At last, I took a breath. I made it.

It's difficult though, I get over it.

The Beginning

2008-11-18T22:47:00.002+08:00

Before 7:00 am, I was dressing up and had a look at currency exchange rate.
8:00, I got on the school bus.
8:30, I entered the File Lib without my score sheet.
9:00, I went back to JN on the school bus.
9:30, I stepped into the classroom and fetched my score sheet.
10:00, I got on the school bus again.
10:30, I made everything OK in the File Lib.
11:00, I was back to JN.

Like Dissolves Like

2008-11-16T21:50:00.002+08:00

I'm now get going with Applebernie's chemistry assignment, not smoothly. Frankly, I confess that it's really a tough job. He's now busy with a report of like dissolves like. When it comes to me, I quickly type it on the screen and search on line. Some information is to the point, while some quote it to discribe a relationship. Actually, two may be easier to get access to each other, if they have a lot in common. However, it doesn't always make sense. Applebernie and I are different on so many aspects. We don't like similar kind of PC games. Nor do we fancy similar movies. Moreover, we build distinguished ideas about interesting incidents. Even though we are undissolvable, still have we got along well with each other. From my point of view, it's all because we have the same life philosophy, that is what we have done and will do must be deserved and we have undertaken something that ought to be realised. All in all, we wanna be NB. Haaaaa...

P.S.Please eat, drink and be merry as much as you can.

I Wanna Be NB!!

2008-11-16T18:30:00.001+08:00

On the first day of my 21 years old, I wrote it down and I carved it in my mind.

I'm Now 21

2008-11-15T15:21:00.002+08:00

I remember that Yanzi wrote her page down when she was 29 on that day in her blog. And I write it down, too. I'm now 21. I am just coming back, tired and mean. Last night, I was drunk. Fortunately, I'm back here, right before the screen. Yesterday, I got in touch with Joan, the key person who will deal with my application. I have met her before and she makes me feel excited. She told me that Knowledge Management and Economics are the two suitable subject for me. I was so confused with what I heard, because I had confirmed that I'd like to choose IPM. It didn't knock me down, although it was really an unexpectable incident to me. And now I find it reasonable and I have to accept it. Whatever, I will have majored in related subject, when I step into NUS or NTU. I could accept it and it's not bad. As a result, my application journey has begun and I will be busy with preparations for everything, such as certification, PS, recommended letters, files and so on. I also realise that it's not so easy to contact with the clerks who do with students' affairs. By the way, I will not give GMAT up. It's not a target but a process. Perhaps, it will be something big which is added to my application paper.

The Last Day Of My 20

2008-11-13T23:07:00.004+08:00

Within the last one hour of my 20, I feel like writing something down. Oddly, I consider it an important day at the very moment. However, I could not tell why. How did I spend the day? Cor! It was really tough all around. The most critical reason is that my money has been exhausted. What a terrible day it is! Let me recall the day I suffered.

In the morning, I ate an apple as breakfast. Then I was late for the class taught by our tutor who is very very rigid. What annoyed me most was that he asked me why I was late! Seriously, I said, I went to fetch my reference book in the library. I thought he would stop to get down with the class. Conversely, he continued to ask me why I would fetch the book at that very moment. All of a sudden, I found it difficult to explain, because the reasons were so complicated that I didn't know how to organize them in a correct and logical way. As a result, I speak out loud, ' It's my fault.' There was a little while that all of the classmates were silent, but then, they burst into laughters. And I was confused, taking my seat. During the 90 minutes, I was dipped into GMAT and cup ear from my tutor. Finally, I was dismissed.

When I found there was only 1.1 yuan in my pocket, I thoroughly depressed. I had to buy 2 baozi for 1 yuan and kept 0.1 yuan by hand. Whatever, what could I do with it?

In the afternoon, I had fun with GMAT. Actually, I enjoyed fighting against him. It was excited to figure the fatal weakness of every problem out and to guess BT ETS's way of creating such BT questions.

The sky was getting dark and I realised I should have supper. Well, you know, 0.1 yuan was lying in my pocket and it would be used to buy nothing. 'Oh, this is my last night of 20!' However, God gave me another life, at least a bowl of delicious meal. Thanks to my best friend Yael who paid me the bill. Frankly, it was simply a meal of qingcai and rousi, though, I was fully substantial in my stomach. So cool the feeling is! I looked at her and found her sooooooooo beautiful!

In the evening, I was still struggling with GMAT. When I was again despaired, Applebernie called me! I couldn't believe the existence of God any more! He told me my 21st birthday had been coming in AUS time. Wa....I was soooooooooooooo moved that I couldn't clearly follow his words, due to the poor connection.

At the last several minutes, I am going to end my diary with thanks. Many thanks to Yael for meal, to Applebernie for wishes and to GMAT for challenges!

Timing With GMAT

2008-11-13T08:01:00.002+08:00

Suddenly, I found the time has been limited for me. Core, what have I done before? Wandering and wandering, all the time. Or else, I didn't concerntrate. However, today is my day.

Patience, carefulness, pressure and motivation are what I need.

Keep my pace and set a target.

It's really a tough job! At least, I have to keen on it and I have been always telling myself I am competing with the time and my energy. Definitlly, it should be mad, angry and tough. This is the life as what I have said before. Let it be the situation I face.

GMAT--I'm coming to embrace u!

Don't Fight For **

2008-10-31T14:14:00.002+08:00

Once opon a time, I thought it would be a sever competetion for me to struggle when I went to Singapore. And I originally considered it difficult and tough and I had to try my best to do everything and grab any little tiny chance to get access to my success. However, today, my guider told me, "Don't fight for...". What does it really mean? How could I understand? Or is it just an attitude to something? I really confused.

How Far Is LSE?

2008-10-18T09:27:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, I was told one of my classmates would apply for LSE. LSE! Once opon a time, I dreamed of it, but right now I feel a little happy because perhaps he could realise my dream, at least he makes it, not me though.
I wish Manxing and Yin good luck! I have no choice.

Anyone Has His Choice

2008-10-16T16:00:00.003+08:00

Gradually, some of my classmates have decided where to go after graduation. One from Yunnan will go to Britain, one of Nanjing will fly to Australia, and another is going ahead for America. Suddenly I find it difficult to express my sorrowness. Little words spoken out when I met with them. However, at least they are still here regardless of being abroad in near future.

The most that depressed me is that Lao's being away. 22nd Oct. is the day he flies to Australia. It's not long before we become close friends, though, we find it happy when we talk to each other. It's maricle that we could get along well with even we don't have the same hobbies.

He's a nice guy! Hah...The pics we've showed to each other will never fade away. Leave the sadness alone. I just wanna have fun in Baima Garden with him tomorrow.

P.S.It's the choice that troubles people to make decision and no choice is best choice.

The First Step I Take

2008-10-03T22:20:00.002+08:00

What does CNY20,000 mean? It means the first step I have taken on the way abroad. Maybe before today, I was just wandering, but right now I feel definitly clear I have to go ahead no matter how difficult it is and it will be.

Today, I signed the contract and handed over ￥20,000 as a deposite prepaid. I choose 3 subjects, intellectural property management, applied economics and finance. My next target is to take GMAT at least scored 600. I will try late this year or early next year.

P.S. Lelouch is OVER.

Finally

2008-09-27T22:20:00.002+08:00

Finally, I stop taking IELTS exam. I still got 6.5 and I've got 6.5 for 3 times! It's amazing even I can't disabey the destiny. Fortunately, I will not try G. However, I feel a little bit sorrow. Just a little. Finally, hu..., finally. I stop.

4 Days' Staying Up

2008-09-23T10:04:00.004+08:00

These days, I feel like nothing to do. Thus I begin to run for Japan's cartoons. It's difficult to say why they fancinate me soooooo much. Perhaps, it reflects another side of myself in a different way. When I was just a child, it's forbiden to watch TV series. Because parents told me I would be addicted to them and could not control myself, esp. my minds caught by the attractive plots. I thought they were right, but on the other hand, I lost a lot of terrific memories. What is "childhood"? School, home and the roads were common for most of my classmate in that era. However, I still had chance to embrace my beloved TV.

Those familiar cartoon pics reminds me a lot. It will never fade away. It has been carved into my heart. I confess it's not fair for me at kindergarton, both of teachers and mates. However, I accepted all in silence. I have faith that I will have a brand new future with my own hands without other related people including my parents. I'm not altruistic maybe, though, who is able to get access to success relying on others.

Lelouch, maybe Zero, or King, will never be able to escape from what kindom he dreams of. He had an unfair childhood due to his parents' deserting him and his sister. He is a little unrealistic that he wanna hold the world all for one thing, love, peace and happiness of future. A present man whose dream is dominating the future, is too ambitious. Who can tell what would happen next? Well, it must have some hints to follow, though, how could you trust them? What's your proof? Where could you find the root, the original one? I'm too weak to take the responsibility to predict my future. But there's one thing that I'm sure definitly, that is my hands, on which I can ever rely.

I has been staying up late to 3 o'clock for 4 days. It's amazing that I attempt to finish this series of cartoons. We have some in common, Lelouch and me. I don't admire him and I don't follow him either. It's just a fiction. Whatever, it refill my recent days. Thanks to it, I'm sure my mind will not wander any more, in the days without IELTS.

Never Say Goodbye To Cartoons

2008-09-21T09:40:00.006+08:00

Recently, I'm crazy about a series of cartoon called "Lelouch of the Rebellion". Acturally, it's not present days that I'm dipped into this TV cartoon, but in last semester. It was recommended by one of my friends, who's a big fan of cartoons.

Definitly, those who have watched "Death Note" will compare "Lelouch of the Rebellion" to "Death Note". They have a lot in common, of course. However, in my notion, girls will prefer DN to LR. Because the main characters in DN change the world in a softer way. In LR, there're numberous super robots which are made use of. I can't help thinking of another TV cartoon that is called Gundan, a perfectly painted robots battles and wars. It facinated a lot of teenagers, esp boys.

Let me recall the season 1. Lelouch is a student of a senior school, crowned intellegence. He's tired of the boring world and plays chess to kill time. In fact, he is one of the empire's 11th generation, but he was deserted. In the bottom of his heart, he's a rebelled man who wannar change the world and build up a brand new nation of liberty and decomoracy. Accidentally, he got a super power called "Code Geass" from C.C. With such power he is able to control anyone, but one can be used once and ineffective to the one who has the same power.

The battle horn is played and Lelouch is on the way to his dream. No one can stop him. Or he will die. It's a little horrible that he has to kill his relatives, but it's a must.

Er...I forgot one most vital thing, Lelouch did kill a lot and led some people, but he did everything all for one, his beloved sister.

I'm continuing to run after "Lelouch of the Rellion".

A Clown's View

2008-09-19T18:09:00.005+08:00

"We are friends! We shall trust each other!" She said.
I'm a little bit afraid if she's the one I've known before, although she was murmuring, speaking or even shouting at me, staring at me seriously.

I'm holding a cup of world. What's that? Water? Coffee? Milk? Juice? Whatever.
My world is like a cup with tinny things. I'm squeezed but I'm standing up. I'm laughed at but I'm sticking to it. I'm fashion dressing but it's not my style. I'm colorful made up but it's fading soon.
In fact, I don't have much to amuse you. I simply belong to the cuplike world.

A clown laughing doesn't mean it's happy. When it's crying, everybody is laughing. It's always the opposite one. It's not a baby, but it has no sex. It is "IT".
It overstates what happened in return with people's laughters. It exaggerates its physical actions to win the audience. To make others happy is what it abides by.
Cupping my ears, I wanner sheild from the loud world. Maybe it's appropriate for me to stay in a louder corner.

I was dreaming of being a ballet dancer once upon a time. It's time to dance with my decorated clown shoes.
Di Da Di Da Di Di Da Da Da...

I thought I could forgive you but I failed. However, I forgot to tell you it was missing and it's vanishing.

New Leaf

2008-09-17T15:53:00.000+08:00

I step one step and I come here accidentally.
It's recommended by one of my friends and I get to try writing something here.
I've got several blogs before, but I wasn't loath to any of these most.
It's probable I will fancy it here. Just it depends...Who knows?